Cold Shower!

mean dad said:

:teeth

don't confuse an abundance of time and an inflated sense of compositional accumen with a need for public validation, stefan. i don't know you; to chastise you via pm's would be bad form. i'm merely adding to the thread that is on a public forum, and attempting to convey a viewpoint i see. also, i like hearing the clickety clack of my keyboard, so i make some of my posts as long as possible. couple that with a slow work day, and it's either this thread, or bp. (and who's gonna remember bp in 6 months? you're barf royalty, baby!!:rofl)
i have no emotional investment in this. i missed the six years prior to the.....the discovery of shenanigans. i feel no betrayal, no remorse over misspent camaraderie, nothing. i never invited you anywhere, so i was never stood up. i didn't offer my help during your accident, so i didn't feel rebuffed. neither did i experience the contributions you made to this site. i only know what i see.



:thumbup OK, let's meet. Skipolini's Pizza in Concord. next wednesday, 7:30. it's actually a regular thing, so there should be a few people there that would love to meet you. probably some that wouldn't, but it's a big place, and we can put tape down the middle if we have to. i plan on spending a lot of money this weekend, so i can't promise to buy you a beer, but i'll smoke ya out...arty

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That's right next to my Financial planner so I know exactly where that is. I have to admit that a large gathering isn't something that sounds overly attractive to me, for other reasons, but apart from the correct kind of apology that I can't seem to find the right words for, I feel a strong need to make things right.

Oh, and it's true, just like Stefan, that I don't drink beer, don't smoke, don't drink coffee, and my blood pressure is abnormally low, so the only thing that makes me "lose my cool" is, well, nothing... But if they serve Patron there, I'll do a shot with you

Wednesday at 7:30 it is. I look forward to shaking your hand. I was sincere when I said that I knew it was my loss if your anger was insurmountable.

David

Holeshot said:

I might bring Dan for the completion of a spectacular series.

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I have a busy schedule ya know! :x

...or I COULD. :x

Feanor said:

Wednesday at 7:30 it is. I look forward to shaking your hand. I was sincere when I said that I knew it was my loss if your anger was insurmountable.

David

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Meet Feanor night at Skips' :wow

Certainly the appropriate location. :thumbup

Damnit. I want my day back. Great story, but fuuuuuuuuu.....

I am in the group of "not pissed, just enjoyed the story."

Squidly McSmearstain said:

By your definition, every work of fiction in history comes from a pathological liar. That seems a bit harsh. Writers write. Fiction writers write fiction. I still don't understand the anger.

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Because most fiction writers are honest and call it FICTION-- from the very beginning, not just when they're whining because they were caught. And if they lie about their identity and personal history in what they claim is nonfiction (JT Leroy, James Frey) and their lies are found out, we get justifiably angry.

Ya Ya, where's the continuation.. I skipped the whining part.. but man, you're only half done.. no office humping, no G humping. Be a man :laughing!!

Janna said:

Because most fiction writers are honest and call it FICTION-- from the very beginning, not just when they're whining because they were caught. And if they lie about their identity and personal history in what they claim is nonfiction (JT Leroy, James Frey) and their lies are found out, we get justifiably angry.

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Most works of fiction are not written solely as a means to listen to the answers that could never be heard any other way. I didn't write to fool you, I wrote to help me. You can't understand this because you are put together too well.

If I stayed away, I would be a "coward that couldn't" face the music" if I come back and explain I'm "whining because I got caught" there is no right thing for me to do because, in your mind, there us nothing good enough.

I won't shout back, that only feeds anger. The authors who you mentioned published books on a national level for gigantic monetary gain. Maybe I would feel better if I had millions of dollars and an Oprah interview to offset the rage of lying, but as it stands, I only have the accident, the injuries, and your rage.

If I came back with a with uncommon response like "you fools fell for it, let it go" would that make more sense and make people feel better than if I "whine" because I don't feel that way, I never have, and the remorse I feel about it is only overshadowed by the relief I feel for being out from under an addiction.

David

Please excuse all the typos and grammatical errors above... IPhone

Feanor said:

Most works of fiction are not written solely as a means to listen to the answers that could never be heard any other way. I didn't write to fool you, I wrote to help me. You can't understand this because you are put together too well.

If I stayed away, I would be a "coward that couldn't" face the music" if I come back and explain I'm "whining because I got caught" there is no right thing for me to do because, in your mind, there us nothing good enough.

I won't shout back, that only feeds anger. The authors who you mentioned published books on a national level for gigantic monetary gain. Maybe I would feel better if I had millions of dollars and an Oprah interview to offset the rage of lying, but as it stands, I only have the accident, the injuries, and your rage.

If I came back with a with uncommon response like "you fools fell for it, let it go" would that make more sense and make people feel better than if I "whine" because I don't feel that way, I never have, and the remorse I feel about it is only overshadowed by the relief I feel for being out from under an addiction.

David

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I wasn't shouting.

Janna said:

Because most fiction writers are honest and call it FICTION-- from the very beginning, not just when they're whining because they were caught. And if they lie about their identity and personal history in what they claim is nonfiction (JT Leroy, James Frey) and their lies are found out, we get justifiably angry.

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Okay, I enjoyed the Stefan, Jocelyn, Erianna, Mark and Gina ride as much (if not more) than anyone. As I said before, I initially thought it was real. But come on........After reading the story and following along were people really convinced it was a factual tale? That story developed into something that would make the writers of Dynasty blush.

As far as lying about identity and personal history. This is the internet. I figure most folks are lying about their identity and history to some extent. For example, I'm a 6'3" former Abercrombie and Fitch model with a degree in Aeronautical Engineering, but I spend most of my free time working with orphans.

I guess I hold published (in book form) works to a higher standard than posts on an internet forum that is known (and infamous) for being a haven for humor and hyperbole.

Squidly McSmearstain said:

For example, I'm a 6'3" former Abercrombie and Fitch model with a degree in Aeronautical Engineering, but I spend most of my free time working with orphans.

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Oh yeah? Well I had sex with Obama back when he was a she in her homeland of Austria. Two times. :x

I'm a "second chances" kind of person, and having the opportunity to start getting to know David a little better over the last few months, I think he's worth it.

what motivates anyone to do something that isn't always honest or acceptable to some? there may be times you never get the answer you were looking for.

you can accept that and move on. you can hold onto it and turn your back. you can shut someone out or you can open a door and issue an invitation for them to enter and talk a little more about themselves, maybe even make a friend.

no one is perfect and we all have our personal demons. sometimes they get a little out of control. sometimes they become a convenient excuse for bad behavior. sometimes their presence is more prominent than our own.

its what you do about them that matters. whether you're willing to rein them in and start running your own life again or continue to point to them as a reason for repeating the same actions over and over. I'm willing to give someone the opportunity to try.

Janna said:

I wasn't shouting.

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No, you weren't. I just saw the "fiction" in caps and it kind of shouted out at me a little. It's just another example of how, when things are written a certain way, we can bring our own experience and perception into the conversation as personal truth, thinking an intent was there, when it never was.

David

Feanor said:

Oh, and it's true, just like Stefan, that I don't drink beer, don't smoke, don't drink coffee, and my blood pressure is abnormally low, so the only thing that makes me "lose my cool" is, well, nothing... But if they serve Patron there, I'll do a shot with you


David

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riiight i dont drink either but if you got count me in!!

Dannielle was one of the few rare reasons that coming back to Barf was a lot less "impossible"

It wasn't a cheery "come on, give it another shot" kind of initial exchange either. The intensity of her anger and frustration in the beginning was frightening, but also elegant, and honest. Honest in a way where I knew the emotion came from a real investment of concern and empathy, which in many ways a betrayal can hurt even more than losing money. There are two kinds of people here. The one's with so many friends and so little time that a once-over makes or breaks the deal, and those that have so many friends and so little time that they know that a potential friendship can never be ignored. Dannielle is the latter.

It's why I kept pouring out my thoughts. Not as a rationalization, or justification, but as a way for her to know something more about "me" aside from just the betrayal so she could make her own decision.

People who offer second chances are few and far between, and if there seem like more than a few its because its as easy to jump on the forgiveness bandwagon as it is to jump on the anger mob one. I don't understand what it is about my personality, and I hate sounding self serving, but I can sense these people, the ones that speak in anger, but not in retribution.

There is another who was a Godsend to me also in this way and so many others. She isn't here now, but she knows her memory continues to save me everyday.

If you think my essence is pathological, and that must be all that I am, ever, then I can do nothing to save myself from your perception any mote than if you saw a smoker from across the room you would instantly decide because they engaged in self destructive behaviour they must be only self destructive and nothing else worth redeeming.

The notion that a person can murder a child, but still deserve a second chance because society was mostly to blame, and a man who lied on the internet desrves to be shunned forever, actually makes sense to me. It makes sense because people's feelings and integrity are worthy of great respect. I'm here because I believe that, and will grab at even the slightest possibility of understanding.

David

Eh, I enjoyed the story. If you got something out of it, we both got something out of it. I'm a pretty forgive and forget sort though...part of the bonus of having shitty memory is it's easy to forgive. :laughing

Thanks for the entertainment, I hope you found the answers you were looking for, and maybe one day I'll shake your hand and we can share a fine...glass of water or something. No judgment here, just a hope for the future

Feanor said:

There are two kinds of people here. The one's with so many friends and so little time that a once-over makes or breaks the deal, and those that have so many friends and so little time that they know that a potential friendship can never be ignored.

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There's a third kind as well. Speaking for myself, the trust I place in others is a little bit like I'm giving them a credit score that is an aggregate of all of the imprints I've had of that individual over time. Each imprint influences my trust level up or down. Some imprints carry more weight than others.

If other people function in a similar way, the best thing you can do is get on with your life here, interact with people and let the quality of those interactions build your reputation over time.

first of all, the first time i read cold shower was about a year or so ago. i blew through pages like it was nothing. it was what i imagine coke is like for the first time; you just want more.

i have only been addicted once to a piece of writing other than yours, and that was "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell".

at first i would say "you narrate very well and are good at accurately explaining situations. but now that i know you made most of it up, dear god... thats just talent and anyone who thinks otherwise is just silly. people swear that everything on the internet is real.

not gonna lie, i had my doubts about your story. but i also found it very entertaining and, frankly, i didnt and dont give a shit if its fiction. its entertaining, you enjoyed writing it, many of us enjoyed reading it. end of story.

welcome back
-Jonny

Feanor said:

......There are two kinds of people here. The one's with so many friends and so little time that a once-over makes or breaks the deal, and those that have so many friends and so little time that they know that a potential friendship can never be ignored. ...David

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that's simplification to the nth degree. as tz pointed out, there is at least a third type. and since i don't fall into any of those three, there must be a fourth option, as well.

how about if you understand that there are many, many people on this board, with many, many different levels of emotion on this matter? to try and catagorize them so succinctly is a fool's errand.

and stop attempting to placate the masses. the people that think you "fucked up" aren't going to be won over by your repeated pleas, and the ones that think it was all an internet exageration, comparable to a good seinfeld episode, don't need your reasoning.

it is what it is. you are who you are. no one but YOU will ever know the truth.

i say loan me your blinged-out zx10, and i'll put in a good word on teh barf for ya.:thumbup