Wow, intense stuff! Sounds like some of the messed up bits of your spinal cord are starting to feel around and hooking back up together where the connections were broken, only not all of them are finding the same places they used to be plugged in. Your nervous system is in overdrive trying to sort out what goes where, what's attached to what, re-mapping the shit. Keep at it! Take those vitamins, work that bike, poke the tingly bits, no telling how far it might go.
Anybody got any stem cells laying around?
Yeah exciting stuff. My body seems to be firing off nerves in all directions. I poke and I prod and me mum packs me full of vitamins, but the bike demo is sadly over. It had a good effect while I had it and I'm very greatfull that the company allowed me to keep it for so long. I'm constantly channeling Uma Thurman and attempt to "wiggle my big toe"-but as of yet the only response has been an unpleasant sensation accompanied by a series of spasms.
I'm incredibly spastic. It's through the roof of late. I end up kicking violently or partially sitting up in bed if I inhale too deeply. A fellow quad suggested that I play with the spasms and attempt to coax some function out of what he calls "noise". It's an interesting concept and he must be on to something as he is three years out from his injury and walking, but with my caretakers refusing to provide my daily range of motion it's a moot point.
The real concerning aspect of things is that I haven't truly slept in a week and a half. I'm constantly exhausted yet end up staring at the ceiling for eight hours once I go to bed...I've always had trouble sleeping but this is just absurd. I've tried everything I can think of, from valerian root, melatonin, soft music, meditation, changing routines, new pillow, old pillow, ASMR, PMR, warm milk, visualization, nature sounds, hypnotic suggestion to really stupid stuff...I'm on the third kind of sleeping med, but I always gain a tolerance before I even finish a bottle, same with the pain meds... Just stopped taking most of em because I end up withdrawing constantly without any real pain relief and feel like a junky...
Worst part is really when I do manage a few hours of sleep though. *I end up with incredibly literal and disturbing drug dreams akin to the hallucinations I had in the hospital. I don't scare easy but this s*** really f***s with my head. Ill spare the details. I hope the new bed will help with that. It should be arriving in the next week so thank you guys so much!
What else...Care giving agency is still a bunch of useless shite-heads that never show up...nothing new there...:mad
On the plus side of things I've become increasingly bored and burned enough holes in my brain with the tv for a year and have decided to begin working again, nothing like before, just cooking lessons from home. It feels great to be back in the kitchen again. I should have my website up within the month. Just need to figure out the lesson structure and decide on sources for product.
I'll have some preview pics up in a bit just for you guys.
you're an incredibly strong person, adam
I dunno strength and plain stubborn seem kinda interchangeable but thanks for the say so. I chalk it up to blasting Oasis and trying to picture the other side... We can meet in the middle and call it determined.
Wow that kinda just wrote itself... Sorry for the TLDR
continued thanks,
-Adam
stock prep,
veal shanks
bordelaise sauce
a rustic fishermans stew
self explanitory
buttered sole, spinach, piopini mushroom fondue