Two recent threads have gotten me thinking.
#1:
One thread was about a rider that miraculously survived 2 very bad (single vehicle) motorcycle crashes. We learned in previous threads that this rider has a wife and children that have suffered do to his poor decisions. He admits to not being able to control himself on a motorcycle.
In this thread there were people advising him that if he really wants to ride, that he should go ride. A pretty extreme opinion wouldn't you agree?
Other people were telling the guy to come out to hang out with riders at social events and motorcycle races. I was quite shocked. Isn't that like inviting a self admitted recovering alcoholic (that you never met in person), to join you for a lemonade at a local BAR? How would you feel if you later learned that that was one of the triggers to a relapse?
2 weeks after I got my first bike, after dropping it a couple times, first time was the first turn I ever took on one, I thought, "Maybe riding is not for me."
But then I took my MSF (yea, backward order, I know), I started riding easy, first with a mentor who would took me on deserted roads. After about 2 months, I was riding around my neighborhood, roads I was already very familiar with. Shortly after, I started to commute on it.
I was riding exclusively just with one-two friends/mentors, didn't join BARF until a year later to look for group rides and more people to ride with.
This is the hard part about interpreting that statement, 'maybe riding is not for me' in any of its itterations. It is such a gray area. So how are you going to know for sure and advice someone to go for it or the otherwise?
The way I see it... you can only give an opinion, emphasizing on consider the pros and cons. It is mentioned that this friend stated he can't control him/herself on the bike. I would ask, "How does it feel when you ride? Especially when you get that feeling you can't control it." To me this means it's not mostly fun. Then ask him/her be true to him/herself, don't have to answer to anyone, but to oneself. Is it really worth it to go through with this?
I would take this friend to some car dealerships. While they won't feel the same, there are cars that are fun to drive. Maybe go gokarting... present alternatives.
Hanging out with riders at social gatherings might actually be more like a patch. Might help to know that he/she can hang out with riders and socialize (be accepted) even though he/she doesn't ride, maybe he/she doesn't need to ride.
#2:
A rider lost their life recently and for some unknown reason their previous driving history was made public and it got me thinking
If you knew someone that rode recklessly, would you speak to them? Would you attempt to help them ride more safely? Would you try to help them learn skills (mental and physical) to help them ride better?
Would you change your mind if you later learned that that rider lost their life in a single vehicle motorcycle accident?[/QUOTE]
This one is harder than anyone would think. I have ridden with some people that I would say are pretty reckless, but only say a word to a few of them.
I believe in personal freedom, but I also know that what each of us do will affect the rest of us directly and indirectly. I would try to say something, at least give my opinion on the subject. Yup, when we sit down and talk about our rides, I would try to help them ride better, talk about how, concerns, etc. Luck vs. skill... I don't believe in pushing luck. Close calls mean no skill, just pushing it and nothing to be proud of.
The most important thing is to
be humble when sharing your side of the stories. Lecturing implies that you are better, that's a big no-no for me. When I talk about my close calls, I don't tell them like they are battle scars, it's more of a concerned sharing. The message is always I was lucky to get out of it unscratched.
Would I change my mind if later the rider lost his/her life in a single vehicle moto accident? Yeah, I'd wish I talked to him/her more about it. Time is just such a precious thing.
I commute on my bike every day, so I think about riding a bit differently than those who treat it like it's the greatest toy and fun in the world.