I *may* have figured out the mystery of the high speed squirming. It's my new slip-ons.
While it did all begin 2 years ago, with the tow truck driver up in Oregon, and he did damage the steering head and swing arm bearings, in between the process of my fixing those issues, I may have inadvertently created a new new, similar issue, when I installed my new aftermarket HD touring slip-ons this past summer.
My R* is a softail, and when I went with true duals some years back, I got an exhaust system made for a softail, i.e. all softail daul exhaust system use a different support than the typical HD touring duals. The touring duals are mounted to the underside of the saddlebag support, unlike the softail duals which have their own frame mounted support.
What I think may be happening, is at higher speeds, the combination of the saddlebags and exhaust are flexing and swinging side to side; similar to what you were saying about the frame flex W800. At certain speeds this sets up an oscillation that makes the back end feel like it's weaving under me, because it is. I essentially have these two, heavy ass pendulums, swinging back and forth behind me as I ride.
The good news is there is a solution. Many bikes with similarly mounted duals use a middle support that ties the two bags together. I never fully understood way, but I think I may have found out. Now I just need to come up with a way to do this. Stay tuned.