• ZERO- WHERE DID MY AD GO?
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      BARF isn't craigslist, ebay, cycletrader, etc. Buyers who are looking to buy from random strangers do so on one of the above mentioned sites. Those who only post in Classifieds sections and don't take part in other parts of BARF are no different than any other random sellers on Craigslist, etc., and should use channels other than BARF to try and sell their items.
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Apartment swap - is that even an option?

BRMSTIK

BRMSTIK

Broomstickracing.com
Apartment swap - is that even an option? I'm trying to come up with creative ways to deal with a bad neighbor situation.

Soooo, one thing I’ve learned about life is if you put it out there, it will come. I’m putting it out there. I need a new and safe place to live.

“To be or not to be a housemate?” That's the question. “I wasn’t looking for a housemate when I found one.” That’s the answer.

I wrote this with a housemate situation in mind. I dare to ask for feedback/solutions that I can work with. BARFers, the key phrase here is THAT I CAN WORK WITH. Not arm me to the :teeth to solve the problem. :laughing

**<added> My housemate is quiet, shy to a fault, a non-drinking/drug using adult. He's been employed almost continuously since living with me, with one small break between jobs. He pays his rent early and I pay the unit's rent on time. I wouldn’t hesitate to bring him with me.

One thing I try to do is be honest with myself about who I am: the good, the bad, the amazing.

Sharing your home with someone is a commitment. It’s a relationship that requires trust, honesty and a willingness to help. It’s helpful to discuss each other’s strengths and weaknesses. For example, your strength may be doing dishes and your weakness is putting them away. No problem! I don’t mind doing either one. I just don’t want to do both. So, I take on putting the dishes away regardless if they’re yours or mine and do it without being asked. You take on the dish-doing. Problem solved. (Yes. This was an actual solution to a housemate situation.) Lessoned learned: Talk! Say what you mean, mean what you say. Find a solution. Do your part.

Sharing responsibilities may not always look equal and it doesn’t have to be, as long as both parties are flexible and in agreement. Another example of good roommating: I cooked more than my 2 male housemates. They liked my cooking and eventually asked if I would also cook for them if they bought the food. No problem! They bought groceries and the good meats. (2 techie salaries vs 1 HR salary) Win/win. I would text them when I was going to be home and cooking. I didn’t mind this arrangement and they didn’t expect a meal every day. But, you have to ask: How were the dishes handled? See above. The third housemate didn’t do dishes. He paid higher rent and was rarely home, ~5 days a month, giving the other housemate and me the luxury of a 4/3 house practically to ourselves. He got a Bye on most household chores, but not all.

Details:
Location: Between San Mateo and San Jose
Move date: Any time between now and yesterday or in the next few months
Rent: Negotiable
Pets: I have 2 cats
No smoking/drugs, light drinking
No OCD habits (I put this here because of my BF. His OCD is tolerable for me.)
Being able to cook and have overnight guests are a must. Isn't that just normal behavior?




Nov 3, 2017
 
GPzPop

GPzPop

Ask me about my B-1-D
not that I can be of any help to you, but, ...

if you are proposing an apartment swap to escape a “bad neighbor situation”, should you not disclose the nature of your grievance for the next proposed tenant?
 
auntiebling

auntiebling

megalomaniacal troglodyte
Staff member
i couldn't even read all the text, but i'm pretty sure that Upperdecker is the solution.
 
BRMSTIK

BRMSTIK

Broomstickracing.com
Thank you for the good comments .... and the funny one. SMH

GPzPop: Yes. You're absolutely right. It is something to bring up, in great detail, if someone were interested in a possible 'swap'. The 'bad neighbor' sitch is towards me personally. My housemate is not affected by it. That makes me the bad guy, right? Maybe.

splate: Good thing, no lease to break. Bad thing, rents are over double what I'm currently paying. Permanently moving right now isn't what I want to do.

auntiebling: I had to look that up. GROSS! Hilarious! I'm not one to do that kinda thing. I'm happy to give you the address and lic plates, tho. LMAO
 
Caddywumpus

Caddywumpus

4N631
onick just ate 4# of trailmix, but why would an upperdecker have anything to do with a car?

EDIT-

why not try to mend fences with said flat mate?
 
Last edited:
BRMSTIK

BRMSTIK

Broomstickracing.com
I appreciate that you are all looking out for me/the community here.

I have tried to resolve the issue(s) with the neighbors. But, when you're the only one willing to try, it makes it hard to succeed.

*frustrating!*
 
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